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So I’m sitting with a bunch of friends on Saturday night, gorging on wine and nibbles when the conversation turns to death (we all know that at some stage during a crap-fest this topic is generally hit on.)

‘We were at a funeral last week, Micheal’s cousin. As the hearse pulled away a beatiful butterfly glided by. It was amazing, It was her, she sent it.’

the conversation then turned to ‘visits from the dead’
‘The family said they could smell flowers,’
‘A Feather floated by the coffin,’
‘The cancer ridden patient strung-out on morphine could see someone in the room’ and so on and so forth.

Of corse the poor man was hallucinating he’s on 600mg of morphine! Feathers leave birds! Flowers grow (and they are occasionally found fresh in grave yards)

Not one member of my group even had first hand experience, they just rehashed story’s that they heard… ‘i know a girl who knows a girl who said they ….’ how much to we trust this non-acquaintance? is she a reliable sorce? Did she really feel her husbands hand on her shoulder at the alter or was she a devistated wife and mother desperatly looking for some kind of comfort. I believe the later.

not to say I don’t understand the need for comfort in these heartbreaking situations, I just dont see the need to attach that need to the physical. Was the deceased persons life not enough! Cant people draw comfort from how their loved one enhanced and effected the world! Do we really need to feel/touch/see the dead for comfort? … I believe its about the beauty you bring to the world while you’re here, not what butterflies you send when you’re gone.